by Siobhan Kinkade
by Siobhan Kinkade
I chose to talk about rejection today for a specific reason. The wonderfully awesome Seventh Star Press has agreed to host me , and as a publisher, the SSP crowd knows what it’s like to be on the nasty side of a rejection letter. Not that either side is really better than the other, but still. It makes sense here.
You see, I used to have this horrible fear of rejection... that if I submitted anything I wrote, it would be read by others, judged, and then laughed at for being the worst drivel to ever be committed to a page. I was always afraid that I wasn't good enough, that I was wasting my time, and that my writing would never take me anywhere. I say this because to get where I am, I had to face that fear. In January 2011, I received my very first rejection letter.
Yes, it hurt like hell. Yes, I got mad. Yes, I got upset and wanted to cry and scream and throw a tantrum. Yes, I wanted to call the editor and yell at her and tell her she was a fool for not buying that story.
But I didn't.
I had that moment of absolute panic - that knife-in-the-chest pain and the fear that I truly wasn't ever going to be good enough to achieve my goals. I became extremely upset and considered deleting the file containing every bit of writing I've ever done. I almost reached the point, staring at that sad little form rejection letter, that I cried.
Then I got over it.
Once I was able to think rationally again, I realized two things: First, I am good enough. I've been writing since I was able to hold a pencil. I used to win awards in school. I had another contract.
I CAN DO THIS.
Second, I realized that the reason it was rejected is because the story wasn't finished. I started looking at it again the next night after I cleared my head, and the more I read, the more I realized that there were multiple loose ends that need to be tied up. Some of the story seemed rushed, and parts of it were stilted.
Once I got over the anger and frustration, I was sort of relieved that it wasn't contracted because I would have gone back through edits and very likely hacked it to bits. I wasn’t happy with the story as it is - don't get me wrong, I love the idea and the characters. But I knew when I looked at it that it still needed a lot of work and had a long way to go before I could actually publish it.
So I put it off to the side for awhile. A good long while, actually. I found my mojo and worked on other things. I contracted another story, then a third. Then I wrote a horror story and sold it under another name. Another pair of romance stories hit the market. In between those successes, my writing resume became scattered with rejections. Twenty-one of them, to be exact. That first book, the one that I loved so desperately yet hated so vehemently, came back to mind and I picked it up for revision.
Then my father died and my world came crashing down around me. I forgot how to function. I lost all motivation and sense of self. I hit a rock-bottom depression that, when looking back on it now, scares me.
Somewhere in the middle of that cloud of darkness, I pushed out a few more stories, picked up a few more rejections, and finished revisions. Then I took that pitiful book and I handed it off one last time to a publisher with the internal threat of the permanent delete key if it failed.
That book, ladies and gentlemen, was the first draft of Loki’s Game. It started on a whim, took a beating, and ultimately helped me through the absolute worst period of my life. Revising the story allowed me to sink back into two things I love – writing and mythology. It kept me distracted yet focused, and gave me a place to vent my frustrations.
Today, I’m very proud to present this work of art, and I couldn’t be happier. It’s a personal triumph.
Ladies and gentlemen, I beat the rejection letters.
Loki's Game Synopsis: Unemployed museum curator Lily Redway responds to an advertisement in the newspaper, thinking she is applying for a job. On the other side of that small, black-and-white box waits two things: a fantasy world come to life and a man named Rowan Keir.
Rowan is a man with many secrets. He is a shape-shifter, a descendent of old world mythology, and the guardian of a rare and valuable Nordic artifact. He is also being hunted by the god Loki and has spent the last six hundred years outsmarting and outrunning him.
With the fury of Asgard on Rowan’s trail, Lily finds herself caught up in a real-life fantasy story, a love triangle, and an ages-old war that pitches her into a different world and one very hard truth: All is fair in love and war.
About Siobhan Kinkade: At a very early age, Siobhan developed a love of reading. By first grade she was on a fifth grade level, and by the time she was a teenager she spent every penny she earned on new books. Oddly enough she gravitated toward science fiction, fantasy and horror while avoiding the romance genre at all costs. It wasn’t until her mother introduced her to Nora Roberts that she realized romance could be fun.
Not much has changed since then. She is still a voracious reader and recovering grammar junkie.
Left to her own devices, she plots interesting ways to seduce, frighten, and destroy. While she finds herself drawn to the dark and eerie, she is also very much a free spirit and hopeless romantic. With multiple stories in publication and several more on the way she spends her time writing happy-ever-afters for the underdogs.
Siobhan writes both contemporary and dark paranormal romance (and a little bit of fantasy and horror under another name, omitted to protect the guilty), much of it of a highly erotic nature. Having never really enjoyed reading romance, she finds writing it to be a cathartic act. By manipulating the characters, she can make the happy endings much more satisfying for herself, and hopefully for her readers as well.
Be sure to connect with Siobhan Kinkade at:
Facebook Author Page: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorSiobhanKinkade
Amazon Author Page: http://www.amazon.com/author/siobhankinkade